If there was a Pandemic Prevention Olympics, South Africa would be on the podium taking gold medals by the barrel full. We’ve had the longest #Coronavirus lockdown in the world.
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Bang, Bang! You Shot Me Down…
…Bang, bang! You shot me down. Bang, bang! I hit the ground. Bang, bang! That awful sound…
Today I’m going to talk about triggers. Not the thingies that you pull to fire a gun, but the ones that fire something in your brain that leave you feeling explosively emotional, whether happy, sad, angry, overwhelmed, excited and/or (insert whatever you’d like to here).
I had two instances over the weekend that triggered negative emotions in me. One was an altercation with a frog-eyed woman who was undecided about what cereal to put in her shopping cart. She was standing on one side of the aisle looking at the variety on display telling another woman with dark hair to bend down and look at something lower down only to tell her “No, I don’t like that flavour”. The Bean asked, “please can we get past?” and the brunette moved out the way. She then said something about “just standing a little to the side” and Mrs. Frog Eyes got all in her face about “we’re all shopping here”. The Bean replied with something in the line of “that’s why we should be considerate” and The Frog shouted down the aisle for her to “Shut up!” I turned around, angry, and said rather loudly, “Excuse me?” and she carried on with “your mother is rude”. I told her she was being rude, and she rewound to “we’re all shopping here!” I think if I’d engaged with her a bit longer, her skin might have tightened so much she would have suffered an ocular proptosis, or worse. I wonder if she ever told her mother to “Shut up!” or if she would allow her children to yell at her to “Shut up!” Either way, I hope her fishwife behaviour left her feeling proud.
Needless to say, what was supposed to be a fun outing for The Bean and I had been rained up both literally and verbally.
Should I ever be in the unfortunate position of having to deal with something like this again the future, I’ll take a leaf out of David Sutcliffe’s books in the first episode of Cracked. I imagine it would provide for some kind of entertainment. Either that, or it could get me committed.
The other was a tv feature called Mighty Cruise Ships which is airing on Discovery. Each episode deals with a different line, vessel and route. It’s extremely interesting, but it left me feeling a bit empty, especially after watching an episode that dealt with various ports of call in the Med and Europe, which co-incidentally would have been the route I would have been on with Charlie for three weeks starting later this month, but life happened and that dream is back in the box. Sure, I’m going to Victoria Falls which is something I’ve dreamt about since I was knee-high to a grasshopper, but part of me longs for the original plan that I was so excited about and looking forward to. I read today that people wanting to do The Devil’s Pool excursion in Victoria Falls need to be able to swim a portion of the Zambezi against the current, so I will have to start swim-fitness again.
In both instances I recognized that I was being set off into a spiral of sadness and also that these things are not a result of something I have done. Still, it doesn’t make me feel less meh about things, so I did what my therapy dictates – I journalled about it, albeit only today, I drank water (because my brain doesn’t work properly when it’s thirsty), I read a bit and I had a (reasonably) early night.
Anyhow, tomorrow I start work for a new company (the one I’m with has merged with another, so it’s business as usual; only it’s not). My social calendar is full for the next two weeks and work is also major-league busy with financial year-end. It’s going to be an interesting last quarter of the year, that’s the one thing I’m certain of. Let’s all keep our wobbly bits crossed that I don’t do my nut before the end of it again, because I am taking a bit of strain again.
I doubt I’ll be one hundred percent hunky dory tomorrow, but I’ll follow Dory’s advice: Just keep swimming – both emotionally and physically – because #DevilsPool is on my #bucketlist
‘Til Next Time
In 2013 I’m Going to…
Wake up and smell the roses…like this softly scented one I just picked out of our garden. Isn’t it beautiful?
How often aren’t we so rushed to do something, or be somewhere, or see to others’ needs that we simply miss the beauty of God’s creation around us?
Though I said in my previous post, I’m not a resolution-making-kinda-gal, I’m going to resolve to do these five things daily:
1. Be thankful for everything I have, every day – because this is A Philosophy we all can Live by. An online friend of mine has an awesome thing – it’s a gratitude jar, and every day she writes something down which she is thankful for and places it in the jar. At the end of the year, she literally counts her blessings.
2. Try to speak only positive things into my life, and into the lives of those around me – and if I stumble, to immediately ask God’s forgiveness immediately and restart the process. I’ve bought Pastor Joel Osteen’s bestselling book I Declare and I’m going to be reading the 31 Promises this January and living them.
3. Give my best at whatever I am asked to do. I’m not saying that it will be perfect every time, but that I will give my best – and if I can’t do it on my own, that I will ask for help.
4. To talk less, (be more patient), and listen more – to God’s Voice, and to those around me.
5. Walk by Faith, and not by sight.
Right, that’s that…no wait! There’s two more:
6. To drink more water and green tea
7. To not go to bed with my make-up on – no matter how tired I am!
Then, I have a bucket list of things I would like to do this year:
1. Read more motivational books – I’ve just bought this book which Nianell signed, with a simple, yet effective message “Just Be…” on Sunday evening after her performance which I was privileged enough to attend. She is an incredible local artist, blessed with an angel’s voice. She is an amazing ambassador for God too – an inspiration and a true light. In the 90 minutes she sang and brought her message, I was moved to tears a few times. After the show, she patiently posed for a number of photos with fans and spoke to each one. Here we are:
2. On the subject of reading, I want to also read all the books I bought in 2012 that I didn’t get around to reading. I realize that this means I am going to be sleeping a lot less than I did last year…
3. Go horse riding at Eight Bells – I’ve told Steve, my trainer, that I want to do this and he will ensure that there is enough lower-back strength training in my program for this to happen. I’m thinking round about July / August – it’s cooler then, perfect weather for mountain outrides. I can’t wait!
4. To go hiking at least once every two months – the Garden Route has some beautiful trails, like the Giant Kingfisher Trail in Wilderness. I think I shall start rallying the troops now already for a hike towards the end of the month.
5. To save a few Rands every month, because I really do want to do the Advanced Novel Writing Course through the South African Writer’s College. Having passed the first part of the course with merit, it is a step in the right direction. I AM going to be published! And my novel IS going to be a New York Bestseller – just you wait and see :-D!
6. To swim in the sea more – I went with Carmen and Ewan to the beach on Thursday and swam in the sea for the first time in easily a decade (if not longer) and it was so refreshing. The fact that I have a bikini ready body now helps too, I’ll admit 😉
7. See more of my extended friendship circle – I am so blessed to have many true angels in my friendship circle, yet I don’t get to see them all as much as I’d like.
8. Watch more movies (at the cinema) than I did in 2012 – shouldn’t be too hard, considering I only saw two last year 😀
9. Take more photos – and share them with those around me, be it through the various forms of social media at my disposal, or here, on my blog.
10. With that said…I will definitely be blogging more than the meagre 33 posts I did last year!
Reflections of a Misfit 