One thing I have struggled with during the lockdown is reading. I’m not sure why, because reading has always been a great form of escape for me. It’s as if my brain refuses to leave the place it’s at now to go to places of fantasy, murder, and intrigue. It’s frustrating to say the least.
Maybe it’s because I’m feeling like John Coffey in The Green Mile, which coincidentally is one of my favourite books.
There is a lot of awful stuff going on. Not just in South Africa, but globally. It makes me sad, even though I know there is nothing I can do about it. As far as possible I try to live in my little bubble, oblivious to what’s going on around me, but the muck still filters through.
I’m not sleeping again which isn’t helping matters either. I am waking up at all hours, thinking about all kinds of things. Most nights it’s my aunt and how her diagnosis has affected The Bean. The two of them of more than sisters, they’re soulmates, family politics aside.
Other times I lie awake wondering if there is oil to be struck in my driveway. I said to Elizabeth earlier this week, “five years ago we earned less than we do now, but it was as if life was better.” We used to go out once a month for dinner and a glass of wine. Since the middle of last year, it just wasn’t possible anymore because of rising costs and our money devaluing almost weekly.
The lack of sleep means that my fuse is short. I am irritable and constantly craving carbs. I baked two loaves of bread on Sunday while at my folks. The one decided to explore outside the baking tin, so I got creative. The Bean and The Toppie kept the larger loaf and I took the smaller one home. Before I could really enjoy it, the ants made a meal of it, so I had to toss it in the garbage. Argh!
In other (less depressing) news, my windowsill garden is thriving. Eliza and Nathan offered that I can transplant the little veggie plants into their big garden at home, seeing that I don’t have the space. I will take the plants when I go and visit next week. I’m not good company at the moment.
What I need is sunshine and water. I’m progressing with the latter. I shall take a walk during the weekend. It should do me good.
Until next time, stay safe and let those close to you know you love them.