Curiouser, and Curiouser…

…is what Valentine’s Day has been for me.  I feel like I have been abducted by aliens.  Seriously, WTF is going on?!

For the first time since I have been on the anti-depressants, or as I like to refer to them, my anti-mental pills, I hit a really bad downer.  I have been teary, irritable, heart sore, hopeless, bitter and angry the entire day.  Not knowing how to deal with this sudden rush of well, depression, I trotted off to town and had lunch with a friend I haven’t seen in ages.  I let rip and she sat there, totally engrossed in what I was saying and proceeded to do what most of my friends do when I am on the brink of an apoplectic fit – she shoved a double thick milkshake in front of me and told me everything would be okay.

I needed some advice on another issue and because I needed an honest, insightful answer on the male psyche I gave Allan a call.  The first words out of his mouth were, “Happy Valentine’s Day Honey Child!” and I nearly burst into a flood of tears.  I told him that it has been a really crap day (it would have been whether it was Valentine’s or not).  He was the first person to wish me a Happy Valentine’s Day which just added insult to injury.  I have wished a number of people, getting the obligatory replies back.  He was relaying his advice when the wonderful invention of call waiting signaled a call waiting – from the West Coast.  I don’t know anyone there, so I ignored the call, thinking that if it was important the caller could leave a message.  He did, but more about that in a moment.  Allan gave me the insightful, honest answer I was looking for, as well as advice on how to handle the sensitive matter at hand.  I rang off feeling a bit better, but I’m still second guessing myself a bit.  I think I will have an indulgent Glenfiddich 12 year tonight.  Maybe that will give me the “oh fuck, who cares” attitude I need to get through this dip.

Anyhow, back to the mystery caller…”Hi MTM, it’s Morris here.  Morris Benjamin, not sure if you remember me.  Please give me a call at xxx xxx xxxx.  Thank you.”  I think to myself, “Okay, uhm, WTF?!  Who??”  True as nuts, when I logged into FB, I see an invitation from this chap, san profile pic (not helpful if I don’t remember you!) and then a message too…”Hi, it’s me, Morris.  Randolph’s friend from Cape Town…”  Still not having a clue who this bloke is, I rang up Elizabeth who was able to vaguely jog my memory.  I don’t know what he wants but if it’s important, he can call back.  From what is stored in my hazy memory, he was a somewhat strange (read scary-strange-weird-creepy) character…

Also, of all the songs that could be stuck in my head, it would have to be the Beatles’s “Blackbird”.  And then I heard the Rolling Stones’s “Paint it Black” and KT Tunstall’s “Big Black Horse and a Cherry Tree…”  WTF?  Red is the colour of love, not black…

Although, come to think of it, Black is the colour of my spirit today, so maybe that’s why those songs stood out more for me today.

Curiouser, and Curiouser…

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3 thoughts on “Curiouser, and Curiouser…

  1. Cindy February 14, 2011 / 7:04 pm

    Black is the colour of my spirit today too, Honey. (hug)

    • Mid-Thirty Misfit February 14, 2011 / 9:37 pm

      Hug for you too Cin 🙂 Hopefully tomorrow will be a better day for both of us.

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