I haven’t blogged for ages! Work is keeping me busy, as usual, and with the writing course thrown into the mix, there isn’t much time for me to do much else, BUT I did finally take some time out this past fortnight to let my hair down a bit. I am going to really try to blog at least twice a week, and then hopefully daily as I used to because it is imperative for me to exercise my writing muscles.
Anyhow, about letting my hair down…
Many of you already know this, but for those of you who don’t, I still live with parents, I’m still single – longing to be attached – and I’m constantly reminded by a number of people around me that they can hear my biological clock ticking – catch twenty two there as well, because it’s not like I don’t want to experience the joys of sex (casual or otherwise), but my mother will not (and bear in mind I’m already thirty one!) allow me to share a bed with any man under her roof, and I’m made to feel quite guilty for going out when Dad is working away, so I don’t get to meet anyone for a casual quickie at his place either.
I have a guy-friend (who is turning into a Friend With Benefits (FWB) – note not a Fuck Buddy (FB) (there is a difference) who I invite around when the folks go away, and it helps to release the tension, but it’s not really what I want (and I don’t think he does either, if he’s honest.) We both love each other on some level, but we also both know that a relationship will never work between us.
Okay, so before I go on, maybe some of you would like to know what the difference is between a FWB and FB. It’s simple really. A FWB is someone you can go out with, to movies, dancing, whatever…without it necessarily ending up with the two of you in bed. If it does end with a session of rumpy-pumpy (I hope you don’t mind me using your catch phrase Only Cin)(http://theonlycin.wordpress.com ), then the FWB is usually still there in the morning to share a cup of coffee (and if time allows, breakfast too). A FB on the other hand is someone you call to release sexual tension with, and who is not interested to wake up with you the next morning.
Oddly enough, this person who is turning into a FWB has been in my life for over a decade already, and despite a number of occasions that things have got a little heated between us, he only kissed me for the first time a little over a year and a half ago. It rocked my world, but it also left with some unanswered questions. I will often tell him when I’m ringing off a telephone conversation, “Okay, love you, bye”, to which his reply has always been, “me too…” I have never expected to hear those three words from him. Ever.
So, Mom and Dad were away for a few days and he came over and after a little too much wine we ended up in bed and things got very hot and steamy. It was fantastic! In the aftermath of the awesomeness, I was lying on his shoulder when he said, “I love you. You know that don’t you?” I was too stunned to say anything, so I pretended to be asleep. Some of you are probably thinking, “they’re obviously really good, if not best friends, they love each other, so why not give a relationship a fair chance?” The answer is simple – I love him. He loves me. BUT he also loves many other women, can’t hold down a job, has a bit of a drinking problem and a number of other personal issues which it wouldn’t be fair of me to mention on my blog.
Anyhow, back to the awesomeness…while things have got hot and steamy between us in the past, this was the first time we’d actually opted for a full out home-run game. It was carnally passionate, yet so tender. It felt so right because it was so good, but it also left me stressing for the past week, because my period was late, but it eventually did arrive on Friday, so I’m not pregnant. What a relief!
This past Friday night I went over to Elizabeth’s house for a braai – to celebrate her brother, Patrick’s 33rd birthday (and finally being assured of NOT being pregnant). A braai at their place is always fun, but this particular one wasn’t just fun…it was GREAT fun. But, with great fun usually comes a great hangover the next day, or in my case, a sore ankle. I know that at some stage, in an attempt to be captured on camera for a group photo (which was set on the self timer), I made a dash across the verandah, slipped and fell on my bum! Note, my bum, NOT my ankle. Patrick’s colleague, Roger was also there and apparently Roger is rather taken with Yours Truly. In fact, he thinks I’m rather fetching (yes, that is the word he used). I will admit, I’m flattered, so I’ve given Patrick the okay to give Roger my number. I am in no way saying that anything more than friends is going to develop, but I’m being open-minded about it. He is younger than I am (which, if anything did develop, would be a first for me, because I generally prefer older men), but he seems mature for his age (a mere twenty-four), and a gentleman too.
Right, that may leave some of you asking “what about Jake the Pilot or Mark the DJ?” In a nutshell, Jake and I are no longer in contact. I’m not going to go into the reason why, but suffice to say, it is a sensitive issue. As for Mark, we still exchange the odd text message, but there will be no romance there – he’s just not that into me…it took me a while to realize it, but I’m actually okay with it.
On other fronts:
I emailed my second assignment for my novel-writing course to my tutor last week and received an 82.4% result! I was very happy about it. I have received the third module already and will begin working on it this week.
Work is still hectic, with various farm audits coming up this month. I have been swamped with paperwork and then a certain retail chain that we pack for gave us 48 hours notice of their audit of us, which had me running around like a mad person, but everything that needs to be in place is, so I know it will go swimmingly.
Mom took Elizabeth, Aunty Carol and Uncle Barry and I out for lunch today and on our way home we stopped at a local antiques place where Mom bought me a beautiful pair of amethyst and marcasite earrings. They are absolutely gorgeous. Perfect for a first date…